STOLEN BALLS! I don’t usually watch the Daily Show, but I do keep it on in the background when I’m tightening my doorknobs. That is how I found out my Ball Post was stolen. When I called the police to report my stolen ball post they kept insisting they could not help me. It turns out “212 hot cops” is not the number for any official NYPD precinct. Disappointing.
- Tried to log my own poop in the babies’ app today. 1 week ago
- Been literarily “reimagined” multiple times, never complained. 2 weeks ago
- The best version of my self is the one speaking on the phone to doctors’ office receptionists. 1 month ago
- It’s my first Father’s Day as a father. I love fatherhood and, as a father, I couldn’t be happier to be the one and… twitter.com/i/web/status/1… 1 month ago
- I’m non-binary. I mean, I have been my whole life, but I just wanted to say it on Twitter so it “counts” before all the spots are taken. 2 months ago